Hack Job (2011).

There are a few things you are guaranteed to find in a movie directed by James Balsalmo. Fun is one of those things. Every film I have seen directed by James has been a joy to watch, showcasing brilliant movie making, gore and a great sense of humor on a small budget. The second thing you are guaranteed to see, are breasts. An abundance of them. I guarantee you'll be in mammary heaven. Hack Job, James Balsamo's debut movie, has all of these ingredients, and much more. In fact, the theme song tells you exactly what you are getting.

"Welcome to the movie thank you for watching it. We can't promise a plot, but there’s a lot of Gore and Tits".

James and Mike are tired of art film taking the credit away from the horror films that truly deserve it. They obtain a movie script from Satan, that will allow them to make the best horror movie ever. The movie then plays out over three separate stories.

Tomb of the S.S

This is the story of what happens when a group of Nazi's unwittingly awaken a curse that makes Mummies rise from their ancient slumber. The Mummies look awesome, and are accompanied by a soundtrack that is reminiscent of Fabio Frizzi. It is incredibly fast paced, and the story will have you wrapped up in itself in no time. The love for the horror genre bleeds through every second of Tomb of the S.S, and that lends itself greatly to the story. The FX are cheap but effective, and the energy the story possesses incredibly frenetic.

Earth is on the Menu.

The second story tells the story of an alien that lands and invades a battle of the bands contest. It is surprisingly even crazier than the previous story. The alien alone had me grinning from ear to ear, even though you could blatantly see the fishing line being used to move it's tentacles. This was obviously intentional though, and it really is genius. The whole story will have you laughing out loud, and again the passion for the horror genre is there in spades.

The Mark.

This story is about a man who becomes possessed by something that wants to kill televangelists. Again, this story is zany in the extreme, and while a little more subdued than what has come before, it was definitely my favorite story out of the three, mixing gore and humor in a very impressive way.

The movie also has a wrap around story, where directors Fulci and Argento (nice little nod there) go around and try to get their script they got from the devil turned into a movie. It works incredibly well and breaks up the stories nicely. There is also a music video from Ghoul, and some fake commercials in there too, which add to the chaotic goings on. The movie manages to capture the magic of guerilla film making and turn it into something truly enjoyable.

The pacing of the movie is fantastic, keeping everything moving along maniacally, throwing that much at the viewer that it is impossible to be bored by what is going on. The FX are cheap but incredibly well done and effective, and there is some amazing gore featured in the movie.There are amazing cameos, most notably Lloyd Kaufman as himself and Rabbi Lloyd in the final story, and Oderous Urungus/Dave Brockie in Earth is on the Menu, who had me in stitches when he was fighting the alien and complaining about the the fishing line that supports it's tentacles.

The best advice I can give when watching this movie, is don't go in expecting something serious. Expect to see a movie with a lot of heart, humor some awesome music and lots of breasts, and there is no way you can be disappointed. The movie has the heart and humor of early Troma, and will be embraced by all fans of indie horror who enjoy off the wall humor and insane story lines. It is also the perfect movie for a Friday night in with lots of snacks, friends and a hell of a lot of beer.

While you are here, won't you head on over to the new Acid Bath Productions page. Give it a look!

Darkest regards......Dani.